About 6 weeks ago, I started thinking through all the things
I needed to do for us to move. Perhaps
this was crazy, but I thought the transition would be smoother if all my babies
were sleeping through the night in playpens or cribs. The twins have this down pat, but little
Maddie Grace has been sleeping her whole life in a sleep and rock (which is, by
the way, a fabulous product!). She has
bad reflux and she has slept well in her cozy little propped up position. Ironically, Makiah slept the same way in a
car seat forever it seemed. They both
like to cross their legs and prop their arms up behind their heads like old men
in recliners! Maddie has been getting
too big for this little seat she sleeps strapped into and has been waking up a
lot trying to move around.
So I determine it is time to do the deed and teach her to
sleep flat in a crib. She is my fourth
baby and all of the others have made successful transitions to cribs, so I am
thinking I have got this. The hubby and
I brace ourselves for two to three long nights of crying. That’s all it takes for a little one to transition,
right? Wrong! Double wrong in the case of sweet Maddie
Grace! It turns out that my happiest
baby was also born with an iron will.
After exactly seventeen nights of
weeping and gnashing of teeth, I start to think this child will break us
before we break her of her little cradle.
I know the battle is over at 1:45 am on the 18th night, when
Cameron and I are huddled in Maddie’s room.
She is in our room in a crib and with our king sized bed letting the world know she will not sleep, and
he tells me he is going to put her
outside on the porch (no, mom, we didn’t do it)!
One of those nights when I was rocking her and trying to
calm her down, I stood between the two beds with her squishy little self
snuggled in my arms…. on one side of
the room is her beloved sleep and rock.
The place she has slept so peacefully for the first 9 months of her
life. It was a perfect fit for those
early days and she was so comfortable growing there. On the other side of the room stands the
delicate, white mini-crib. It is the place of uncertainty for Maddie Grace, but
it is also her future.
I think to myself how
silly it is that she is doing all this crying about sleeping in one and not the
other. After all, they are only a few
feet apart! I marvel that a little
change that seems like a no brainer from my perspective, is enough to throw my
child into all out panic mode for weeks.
I whisper to her that mommy will
love her and keep her safe in the crib just as much as in her old bed. I say to her that I will be watching and
listening and be just as close to her in her crib as I was before. She just needs to trust me.
And then I hear it.
The whisper in my heart. That I
am really just like my precious daughter.
What seems like such a big change to me is really not throwing God for a
loop at all. In fact from His
perspective, a move (or any big transition we make) is no more unsettling than
sliding a few feet across a nursery to a new bed. El Rohi.
He is the God who sees. And He is
there. Listening for our cries. Loving us like precious children as we take
baby steps toward the future. And the
plans he has for us. Whispering peace
and words of promise to our hearts. If
we will quiet ourselves to listen, we will hear the still small voice. Reminding us to trust Him.
Now if only I could get my Maddie Grace to understand the
whisper! Then our little chat could have
solved the problem! Just in case you are
curious, she won. I decided she could
stay in that little seat until she was four and her legs dangled to the floor
as long as we could SLEEP! But in reality,
she only spends about 4 hours in that little cradle these days. Then the rest of the night finds her exactly
where she really wanted to be all along… snuggled in our bed, right between
mommy and daddy!
Isaiah 30:15 This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength..."
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