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The Lies We Believe Post #4

This week we are hearing from one of my favorite people on the planet!  She is my confidant, my encourager, the one I can always count on to be there... my mom, Jeanie.  She shares how God speaks to us through the little things and how we can see Him in our circumstances if we will look...

Several years ago the Lord begin to reveal to me the lies of the enemy that I had bought into – the triggers that the enemy of my soul uses on me, sadly, over and over. One of the big ones is an overwhelming sense of inadequacy. “I’m not enough.” And it can be all encompassing: not a good enough Christian, not a good enough wife, not a good enough mother or mother-in-law, not a good enough grandmother, not a good enough friend, not a good enough hostess and cook! I could go on and on. In talking with other women, I have learned that I am not alone in that struggle, and actually, I think many men also deal with that issue in certain areas of their lives. We live in a very performance-based society, and we are taught that our worth is closely tied to our performance.

Yet there is something else the Lord begin to impress on me several years ago – something significant, something profound. I am loved with an everlasting love. I have been drawn to Him with unfailing kindness! (Jeremiah 31:3) “I am my Beloved’s and my Beloved in mine.” (Song of Solomon 6:3) He takes great delight in me. In His love He no longer rebukes me but rejoices over me with singing. (Zechariah 3:17) Would that kind of love belittle or criticize? Could that kind of personal affection and delight be true? Can I believe it? Will I believe it?

I know that I am in His family. I have known it since I was a little girl and asked Jesus to come into my heart. I’ve also known that I am loved by Him to the point that He even gave His life for me. But what I have struggled with is believing that He actually likes to be with me – delights in me! Why? It seems too good to be true! Sometimes I don’t like myself! I am well aware of my weaknesses, faults, sins, and I certainly know that He is well aware of them also. Yet I am coming to believe and actually WALK in the knowledge that His love and even correction are life-giving, not demeaning in any way. He is not up in heaven with a frown of disappointment on His face. He has known me intimately from my conception. Nothing I have done or will ever do is a surprise to Him. I cannot EARN His affection; I already have it. Can I disappoint Him? Yes, I can, but He knows that is not what I desire to do. 

In 2011, about seven months after our little granddaughter Makiah was killed in a car accident, my husband accepted a new job in North Alabama, which meant a move for us, meeting all kinds of new people, and engaging in conversations about who we were. While I was happy for him, I was still dealing with deep grief and honestly did not know how I was going to make that move emotionally or physically. Rachel’s twins were just a few months old and my heart was there with her and Cameron. I had some very frank conversations with the Lord and told Him I felt I simply could not do it and He was going to have to help me. In that move I saw and experienced God’s kindness towards me. We were referred to a couple that needed to rent their beautiful, partially furnished lake home for nine months. It was about 25 minutes from town, and it was so quiet and peaceful – just what I needed. Because it was partially furnished, I did not have to move most of my household at that time. I also met our neighbors from across the slough who had lost their daughter-in-law in a car accident, leaving 10 year old twins and a very sad husband, about the same time we lost Makiah. She could fully relate to the grief I was dealing with, with no need for explanation. She also invited me to Community Bible Study where the study was on – guess what? Job and I Peter on suffering! For that nine months God surrounded me with His love and encouragement from so many places. At the end of that time period, I was ready to move in town, engage with people, and see what else the Lord had in store. I felt so “seen” and loved by Him!

It’s His love that heals me and makes me whole. It’s His love that changes my thinking, renews my mind. My adequacy is not in myself. My adequacy is in Jesus. (2 Corinthians 3:5). In my weakness He truly proves Himself strong. Over and over He comes through for me – IF I will let Him. And God is no respecter of just certain people. He wants to show Himself strong in each of our lives and make Himself known to us. What He does want from us is to seek Him with all of our hearts and to surrender to His ways, so we can experience all He has for us. We have this promise, “You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

My friends, I choose to recognize the lies of the enemy and stand against the evil one, even if that requires a moment by moment choice. Will we believe that He is able to do far above all that we can think or imagine – in US? I have seen in my own life that as I embrace this truth, that kind of love can pour out of me to others – not held back by my own issues. Jesus longs to use us to reveal His love to others, but it starts with believing His love in us. These verses have become some of my favorites:

“So we know and rely on the love God has for us. God IS love. Whoever lives in love lives in God and God in him.” I John 4:16

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” I John 4:18


“I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:4

Comments

  1. sandyluFebruary 12, 2020 at 7:07 AM

    Wonderful articleJeanie!! Nothing like the LOVE OF GOD!

    ReplyDelete

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